Cries in the Night
by AimesL
Summary: Will they survive the dark tear-filled night? Sequel to Haunted Memories.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Sue Thomas FBEYE and Criminal Minds do not belong to me.**

 **Words in capital letters are signed.**

 **Chapter One**

FBI Supervisory Agent Derek Morgan raced through the ER doors and nearly attacked the first nurse he saw.  
"I'm looking for Dr. Spencer Reid, agent with the FBI!" Morgan waved his badge in the terrified young lady's face.  
"Sir." An older nurse stood up behind the admissions desk and glared at him.  
"You need to wait in the waiting room."  
Morgan strode over and slammed his badge down on the desk. "Where is Spencer Reid? What happened to him? I got a message that he was at the hospital."  
Seeing the fear in the dark eyes, the nurse relented and turned to her computer. "I'm sorry, sir. No one with that name has been brought into the ER."  
Morgan's shoulders slumped and he rubbed a hand over his head. "He has to be here. Could he have already been admitted?"  
"If he had, it would show up here." She glanced up and sighed when she caught the near desperate look in the man's eyes. "Are you sure your friend was brought to this hospital?"  
"Yes."  
"Do you know what's wrong with him?"  
"No." Morgan paced in front of the desk. "With Reid it could be anything. Gunshot, anthrax, migraine,…"  
The nurse tuned out the mumblings of the frantic man and turned back to her computer.  
"Ah ha, here we go."  
Morgan stopped pacing and spun back around to the desk. "What?"  
"A Tory Reid, wife of Spencer Reid was admitted to the maternity ward. Sixth floor."  
A grin spreading across his face, Morgan sprinted toward the elevators.  
"Thank you!" He shouted over his shoulder.

Derek Morgan bolted out the of the elevator the moment the doors slid open to reveal the cheerfully decorated maternity ward and nearly fell headlong over a wheelchair holding a mother and her new daughter.  
"I'm sorry. Excuse me. Sorry."  
The husband gave Morgan an understanding, sympathetic smile. "Relax, man. You'll survive this."  
Morgan stopped in his headlong dash to find Reid and realized that everyone thought he was a frantic father-to-be.  
Drawing in a deep breath, he forced himself to calm down. Glancing both ways down the hall, Morgan caught sight of the tall form of his colleague and best friend.

"Reid." Morgan stopped in surprise when the young man spun around cradling a tan-skinned, dark-eyed baby boy on one arm.  
"Morgan! Thank God you're here. I need help."  
"Kid, the next time you txt to tell me you're at the hospital and need help could you be a little more specific? You nearly gave me a heart attack."  
"Sorry. But I need help!"  
"Okay. Calm down. What's going on? The nurse said Tory was admitted. Who's that?" Derek pointed to the wide-eyed infant resting comfortably in the crook of one of Reid's arms.  
Spencer Reid shifted uncomfortably on his feet. "This is my son."  
Derek's eyebrows shot up.  
"Reid." He spoke slowly as though afraid his friend had actually snapped and gone crazy. "Tory hasn't had the baby yet. And I don't think they come out that size or that alert."  
"It's a long story and I really don't have the time." Reid started his frantic pacing again.  
"Hey." Morgan grabbed his arm. "Come on, kid. Calm down. I'm here to help, but I can't if you don't tell what's going on and what you need."  
Reid's hazel eyes dropped to the floor. "Please, don't be mad."  
"I won't be mad, Pretty Boy. I promise."  
"I know I should have told you sooner. Should have told everyone. I wanted to, but…" Reid sighed. "You remember Tory's cousin, Ali, the social worker?"  
"Yeah."  
"Well, three months ago she told us about a month-old baby boy who had just been turned over to social services." Tears choked Reid's voice. "His parents poured hot oil down his diaper because he wouldn't stop crying."  
Reid shrugged. "Tory and I couldn't get him out of our minds. We fell in love with him even though we hadn't seen him and decided we wanted to try to adopt him. We weren't sure if it would work out. If we would be approved or if…"  
He swallowed hard. "Or if he would even live. So, we didn't tell anyone. We've been visiting him in the hospital every chance we got. He's had five reconstructive surgeries. This morning we got a call that the adoption had been approved and our son was ready to be released from the hospital. Then Tory went into labor and everything got crazy."

Reid drew in a deep breath and shifted the baby in his arms. "Morgan, I would like for you to meet my son, Derek Matthew Reid."  
Spencer raised uncertain hazel eyes to meet Morgan's shocked face. "I hope you don't mind. He is just as much my child as the baby Tory is going to give birth to. And I wanted my firstborn to be named for my brother."  
Morgan shook his head.  
"Mind? Reid, of course I don't mind. I," he blinked away the tears filling his eyes. "I'm honored beyond measure. Thank you." He reached out and ran a finger down the soft skin of the baby's cheek.  
Little Derek stared at him with wide eyes then gave him a heart-melting smile. Morgan brushed away the moisture in his eyes. How could anyone hurt something so beautiful?

"I was wondering if you could keep him in the waiting room for me while I'm with Tory."  
"Of course, kid."  
Reid hesitated, obviously conflicted about leaving his son even with his best friend.  
"He's still very tender and raw in his diaper area. I have medicine and creams in his bag. If he gets fussy or needs to be changed just have a nurse come get me. There are bottles, bottled water, and formula in there two. The formula is already divided into servings. Just dump one section of the container into four ounces of warm water."  
Reid glanced at a clock. "He needs to eat in two hours. Sometimes he doesn't eat well. All the surgeries and medications have messed with his appetite."  
Morgan grinned at the protectiveness his friend was already showing. He laid a gentle hand on the younger man's arm. "We'll be fine. I promise. This little guy and I will get acquainted and I'll call the others and explain everything. You just go be with Tory and don't worry."  
Reid drew in a deep breath. "Okay."  
He gently placed the baby in Morgan's waiting arms then leaned down and pressed a kiss on the soft forehead. "Be good, Derek. Daddy loves you."

Bobby Manning groaned as his thirteen-month old daughter rolled over and crawled away for at least the tenth time as he struggled to diaper and dress her.  
"Kyra Leigh, stop it." He snatched the toddler and plopped the wriggling body on his lap. "Come on, Pretty Girl. Be still. We have to get you dressed so we can go to Uncle Murdoch's birthday party."  
"Doch?" The toddler asked, tilting her head back to look at Bobby.  
"Yes."  
Bobby took advantage of the momentary distraction and slipped the dress Tara had picked out over their daughter's head. Grinning at his success, Bobby shook his head at the shoes and stood; Kyra on one arm and a tiny pair of shoes dangling from his other hand.  
His phone vibrated and Bobby switched the shoes to his other hand and pulled it off his belt.  
He glanced at the message and his green eyes widened as a smile stretched across his face. He hurried into the living room where Tara was combing five-year old Robert and Stanley's hair.  
"Tara! You'll never believe this. Derek just txt. Spencer and Tory adopted a baby boy, Derek Matthew. And Tory just gave birth to a healthy baby boy, Gideon Riley."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Song lyrics do not belong to me.

 **Chapter Two**

Jack Hudson glanced over at his wife as he drove. Seeing her frustrated expression, he reached over and snagged her hand, tugging it lightly to get her attention.  
"Relax, honey. It's fine."  
Sue rolled her eyes. "We're going to be late. I don't know why I let you talk me into getting family pictures the same day as Murdoch's birthday party."  
Jack turned and waggled his eyebrows at her playfully. "Because I can be _very_ persuasive."  
"Jack Hudson!" Sue tugged her hand free and slapped his shoulder. "Keep your eyes on the road when you have my children in the car."  
"Oh, so they're _your_ children, huh?"  
Sue glanced over her shoulder at where the four Hudson children were all peacefully occupied with the books she had handed them. "Of course they are. Look at how angelic they're being."  
Jack smirked, his mind drifting back to the photography studio when Sue had plopped a very unhappy baby in his arms and demanded that he do something with _his_ son.  
Despite the squirming, tears, and tantrums, they had managed to get several good shots and the photographer had proclaimed them the most beautiful family he had ever seen.

"Told you we'd be late." Sue said as they walked toward the picnic tables in the park and saw the team, plus Joseph and Lucy, already gathered.  
Jack smiled as he heard the laughter drifting over from the group. There was so much stress in their lives it was always good to hear them laugh.  
Jack stopped walking and swung Anna Grace down from his shoulders. He waited until the four-year old's dark brown eyes were fastened on his lips. "Go to Uncle Murdoch."  
The little girl looked toward the picnic tables where he pointed and her eyes lit up in understanding.  
"Unca Murdoch! Unca Murdoch!" Anna Grace's soft, lisping voice drifted on the air and the young man spun around.  
Even from a distance Jack could see the smile on Murdoch's face as the young agent broke away from the group and hurried to meet the little girl.  
Jack shifted the picnic basket he was carrying to his other hand and draped an arm around Sue.  
"She's the only one who can make him smile like that." He nodded toward where Murdoch Jamison was kneeling down, hugging Anna Grace.  
"I know." Sue shifted her youngest son in her arms as six-year old Jackson and five-year old Wesley ran to join Robert and Stanley Manning who were kicking a soccer ball in the grass.  
"They have a very unique bond. I wonder if it could have anything to do with the fact that he delivered her."  
Jack's brow furrowed and he shrugged. "I guess it's possible. Or at least that could explain why Murdoch is so attached to her, but I doubt that could be reason why Anna Grace adores him."  
"I don't know, Jack. She has loved him from day one. She always stopped crying every time he held her."  
"Hey, Sparky!" Their conversation was interrupted by a shout from Bobby. "Are you and the missus going to join us or are you just going to stand there making googly eyes at each other?"  
Jack rolled his eyes. "We're coming, Crash."

Jack Hudson's eyes opened when he felt someone staring at him.  
Four-year old Anna Grace was standing by the couch, looking down at him. She was dressed in a purple nightgown; her blonde hair still damp from her bath.  
Jack smiled at her as she raised her tiny hands to sign. "DANCE, DADDY?"  
"Of course, sweetheart."  
Standing, Jack put their cd in the player. Anna Grace loved to dance with her daddy and the song had become theirs the first time Jack heard it. The music began to play and Jack held Anna Grace's hands as she stood on top of his feet. As they danced around the living room, Anna Grace gazed up at Jack; reading his lips as he quietly sang the words to their song.

 _"She spins and she sways to whatever song plays_

 _Without a care in the world._

 _And I'm sitting here wearing the weight of the_

 _World on my shoulders._

 _It's been a long day and there's still work to do_

 _But she's pulling at me saying, 'Dad, I need you!'_

 _There's a ball at the castle and I've been invited_

 _And I need to practice my dancin'_

 _Oh, please, Daddy, please._

 _So I will dance with Cinderella_

 _While she's here in my arms._

 _'Cause I know something the prince never knew._

 _Oh, I will dance with Cinderella_

 _Don't want to miss even one song._

 _'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight_

 _And she'll be gone._

 _She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed._

 _She wants to know if I approve of the dress._

 _She says, 'Dad, the prom is just one week away._

 _And I need to practice my dancin'._

 _Oh, please, Daddy, please._

 _So I will dance with Cinderella_

 _While she's here in my arms._

 _'Cause I know something the prince never knew._

 _Oh, I will dance with Cinderella_

 _Don't want to miss even one song._

 _'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight_

 _And she'll be gone._

 _She came home today with a ring on her hand._

 _Just glowing and telling us all they had planned._

 _She said, 'Dad, the wedding's still six months away_

 _But I need to practice my dancin'._

 _Oh, please, Daddy, please._

 _So I will dance with Cinderella_

 _While she's here in my arms._

 _'Cause I know something the prince never knew._

 _And I will dance with Cinderella_

 _Don't want to miss even one song._

 _'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight_

 _And she'll be gone_

 _She will be gone._

 _And I will dance with Cinderella_

 _While she's here in my arms_

 _'Cause I know something the prince never knew._

 _And I will dance with Cinderella_

 _Don't want to miss even one song._

 _'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight._

 _But the dance will go on."_

As the song ended, Jack brushed the tears from his eyes and lifted his sleepy little girl into his arms.  
"Love you, Daddy." She mumbled.  
Smiling, Jack gently pressed the ILY sign onto her back with the fingers of one hand and carried her up the stairs.

He met Sue in the hallway as she came out of the boys' room.  
"James is asleep. The boys are waiting for you to pray with them." Sue reached for Anna Grace. "I'll put her down."  
"Okay." Jack pressed a kiss on the silky blonde hair and gently nudged Anna Grace's head up from his shoulder.  
"Goodnight, Miss Sparkles." He whispered as he handed her to Sue.  
"Night."  
Jack grinned as the little girl turned and nestled into Sue's shoulder. Bobby had gotten it right with this Sparky nickname. Anna Grace was the sparkle in all of their lives. If she ever wasn't there, Jack didn't think any of them would survive.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

"James Shepherd! I said to stay out of the trash." Sue Hudson groaned in exasperation as she pulled her youngest son away from the kitchen trash can for the tenth time in the past hour.  
She rolled her eyes at the wide open mouth and scrunched up face of the eight-month old; for once grateful that she couldn't hear.  
Bouncing the screaming baby in an effort to calm him down, Sue couldn't keep a tender smile from crossing her face. "It's a good thing for you that you look just like your Daddy otherwise you might not survive until your first birthday."

She plopped the unhappy baby into the playpen. "Now, please stay put while I finish getting ready and we'll go see Daddy for lunch."  
Sue would never understand how a child who could not walk could somehow climb out of almost every confinement his parents tried.  
Sadie pawed at Sue's leg and raced over to her vibrating Blackberry. Sue glanced at the message and her eyes widened. "Never mind, buddy. We have to go get your brothers."

Bobby Manning and Jack Hudson looked up when their wives appeared in the doorway of the bullpen. Their smiles faded when they saw the expression on the ladies' faces.

"What's wrong?"  
Sue glanced over her shoulder. "Get in here."  
Everyone stopped working and watched as six-year old Jackson Hudson, five-year old Wesley Hudson, and five-year old Robert Manning reluctantly stepped into the bullpen; their eyes glued to the floor.  
Jack and Bobby exchanged glances.  
"What's going on?" Jack asked slowly.  
Sue shifted James, who was squirming frantically in his attempt to reach Jack.  
"Jackson, do you want to tell your father what you and Wesley did at school today?"  
The little boy shook his head; his gaze firmly planted on his shoes.  
"Jackson."  
"Wait." Tara held up a hand. "I think Robert should tell them. He started this." She shifted her daughter to her other hip and glared at her son.

Jack and Bobby stood and made their way over to the doorway. Jack took James from Sue.  
"What happened, son?" Bobby eyed Robert.  
The five-year old shifted on his feet and remained silent.  
"Robert. You know it will be worse if you don't own up to what you did."  
Robert drew in a deep breath and squared his small shoulders. He raised his head; his green gaze meeting Bobby's. "We handcuffed Declan to the flagpole."  
" _What_!?" Several voices responded at once.  
"Where in the world did you boys get handcuffs?" Jack asked.  
Suddenly every eye in the room turned to Bobby.  
"What?"  
"Bobby." Jack raised an eyebrow.  
Bobby sighed and threw his hands up. "I gave them one of my old pairs of cuffs."  
He turned to Robert. "I told you, you were only allowed to play with them when I was home."  
Tara rolled her eyes. "I cannot believe you gave our five-year old twins FBI issued handcuffs."  
Bobby frowned. "Where is Stanley?"  
"He's still at the church. He wasn't involved this time. Apparently, he had gotten distracted by a science project the older kids were working on."

"You know," Myles spoke up. "This is why Jade and I have girls. Little girls are too perfect to participate in these kinds of shenanigans."  
He came over and took Kyra from Tara. Jack wanted to argue, but he had to admit that Myles and Jade's blonde, blue-eyed daughters were as close to perfect as any children Jack had ever met. How that was possible since they were related to Bobby, he had yet to figure out.  
"Speaking of perfection," Myles turned to Sue. "Where is Princess Hudson?"  
Sue smiled. "At church. She has speech therapy today."

Jack and Bobby turned back to their boys who were waiting for the verdict.  
"Jackson, Wesley, did you two know that Robert wasn't supposed to play with the handcuffs without Uncle Bobby?"  
The two Hudson boys glanced at each other and finally nodded.  
"Yes sir."  
"He told us the same thing."  
"So, you disobeyed your uncle, helped Robert disobey, and frightened a classmate."  
Their heads dropped lower. "Yes sir."  
Robert raised his head and glanced frantically around the room, looking for an ally. "But we were playing cops and robbers. And Declan was the robber. And he resisted arrest!"  
Several heads in the room turned away to hide the smiles at the little boy's indignant voice.  
"Robert, you disobeyed."  
Bobby and Jack shared a glance; able to communicate perfectly with that one look.  
"I think you three know what this means."  
"Yes sir." They spoke quietly.  
"Okay. Let's go." Jack and Bobby sighed heavily as they took their sons' by the arms and led them down the hallway.

Derek Morgan grinned as he watched Spencer Reid finish yet another cup of coffee. Despite the large amount of sugared caffeine he had consumed in the past hour, the young man couldn't hold back a yawn.  
Morgan chuckled. "What's a matter, Pretty Boy? Haven't you been sleeping?"  
Reid glared at him, but it faded quickly as his gaze dropped to baby Derek cradled securely in the crook of his arm.  
"I don't mind missing sleep for this. It's a _very_ good reason."  
Morgan smiled softly. "Better than the nightmares, huh kid?"  
"Oh, yeah." Reid yawned again and glanced toward the coffee machine.  
Morgan rolled his eyes. "Seriously, kid. Go home. You're not supposed to be at work anyways."  
"I told you. I don't want to get behind on paperwork. And Tory thinks it will be easier for her if she gets used to being alone with the boys gradually, instead of me being around all the time and then suddenly gone."  
Morgan nodded.  
"Makes sense. You do know that Garcia is going to kill you when she finds out that little guy has been here for an hour without her knowing it, don't you?" Morgan gestured to the baby Reid held.  
"I know. But she would want to take him to her office and I just…" His voice trailed off as his eyes dropped back down to the baby.  
"You aren't ready to let him out of your sight yet. I get it, kid."

Morgan watched Reid for a minute and frowned. "Hey, what is it? What's eating you, man?"  
Spencer shrugged and remained silent; his hazel eyes fixed on the content baby in his arms.  
Morgan sighed and moved to sit on the edge of Reid's desk.  
"Come on. Spill, kid."  
"What if we did the wrong thing by adopting him?"  
Morgan frowned. "What do you mean?"  
Reid sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know how to be a father." His voice shook. "And now I have _two_ sons. What if I mess up and they hate me? What if I go crazy?"  
He raised tear-filled eyes to meet Morgan's. "What if I fail them and they turn out like one of our unsubs?"  
"Reid. Listen to me. Those two baby boys are the luckiest kids in the world because they have you as a dad. They will never hate you, Reid. That isn't possible. Look at him."  
Morgan pointed at Derek who was staring up at Reid with wide brown eyes.  
"He already loves you. He knows he's safe with you. Just like Jack and Henry do. Kid, I have _always_ known that you would be a great father. You are so good with kids. Jack and Henry adore you. And every time we have had a child victim, you have worked so hard. Like the way you worked to find Michael in Vegas. Or how good you are with kids who have witnessed something, like Jeremy and Sammy. Or even how you handle kid unsubs like Owen Savage and Samantha."

Morgan shook his head and sighed. "Kid, you have _got_ to stop selling yourself short. I don't understand why you do that. Reid, you are not going to fail your baby boys. When we found out that Tory and Savannah were pregnant, I was so grateful that your baby was due first because it gives me a chance to learn from the best for a short while before my turn comes."  
Spencer shifted in his seat; his eyes still downcast.  
"Reid, look at me. Look at me."  
Morgan waited until Reid raised his eyes.  
"You already _are_ a great dad. Those boys are so blessed. And you have God in your life now. He'll help you. Do. Not. Sell. Yourself. Short. You got that, Pretty Boy?"

A flurry of activity in the hallway drew their attention as every TV suddenly came on. Every agent stopped in their tracks and stared at the televisions as a frantic-looking reporter appeared on the screen.

"Breaking news. There is another shooting in progress at another church. We are just being informed that this is an organized terrorist attack. Once again we are being attacked on our homeland."  
Morgan and Reid jumped to their feet as Hotch and Dave raced out of their offices.  
Hotch pointed toward the conference room and Morgan and Reid quickly followed.

"What is going on?"  
"Ten churches or Christian schools have been attacked this morning." Hotch glanced down at the sheet of paper in his hands. "Shiloh Baptist Church in Georgia. Faith Academy in Tennessee. Amazing Grace Community Church in New York. Harmony Christian School in North Carolina. Blueridge Christian Academy in Virginia. Calvary Community Church in California. Cornerstone Baptist Church in Maryland. Good News Bible Church in Washington State. Living Water Community Center in Florida. And New Life Baptist Church in D.C.  
Early reports coming out of Georgia say that the attackers were screaming 'Allah Akbar.' It has been confirmed that this is an ongoing active terrorist attack and there could possibly be more targets."

"Wait a minute." Morgan turned to Reid. "Isn't New Life where the Hudsons and Mannings go?"  
Spencer nodded; his face pale.  
Hotch frowned. "They wouldn't have any reason to be at church at this time of day would they?" He asked, glancing between his two agents.  
Reid looked up; his eyes filled with fear and horror. "The kids go to school there half a day."  
Morgan glanced at the clock and began to fervently pray that the Hudson and Manning kids had not gone to school.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

"Bobby!" Myles jumped from his car and raced around the vehicle to stop his friend. "Wait!"  
"Let me go, Myles!"  
A police officer stepped forward to help Myles hold the man back.

"Jack! Stop!"  
Myles glanced up to see Demetrius having a similar struggle with Jack.  
Two officers were holding Tara and Sue back.  
"Bobby!"  
"Myles, let me go! My son is in there."  
Tears filled Myles' blue eyes. "I know, Bobby. I know. I can't let you in there. You know that."

D dragged Jack over to Bobby and Myles. "Jack, stop it or I'm having someone drive you back to headquarters and locking you up." D kept a tight grip on the younger man, looking for signs that he was calming down.  
"D," Jack's voice was choked. His dark eyes stared at the black smoke billowing from one corner of the church building where a small bomb had exploded only moments earlier.  
"My little girl is in there."  
"I know, buddy. I know. And that's why you are here as a parent and not as an agent. You _will_ stay outside behind the barricade."

Special Agent Joseph Davis walked over, tightening a strap on his Kevlar vest.  
"Jack. Bobby. My team is leading this. Trust me. I will find Stanley and Anna Grace. You need to stay with Sue and Tara and the kids." He clapped a hand on his friends' shoulders and turned to find Josiah Carter and Murdoch Jamison standing behind him suited up.  
Joseph raised an eyebrow. "And what do you two kids think you're doing?"  
"We're going with you." Murdoch's icy blue eyes stared at Joseph as if daring him to refuse.  
Joseph glanced at D.  
Seeing that Jack and Bobby were controlled for the moment; Demetrius stepped to the side with Joseph and rubbed a hand over his face.  
"Go ahead and use them. If we don't Murdoch will find a way to sneak in and I'll have to suspend him." D hesitated, glancing toward the church building. "And if there are survivors, Murdoch's the best agent with kids."  
Joseph nodded and turned around. "Okay, pups. Let's go."

Spencer Reid hung up his phone and reached to take Derek back into his arms.  
Morgan handed the baby over; dread filling him.  
Holding his son tightly, Reid raised his eyes to meet Morgan's.  
"That was Tory." The young man's voice was hoarse. "She heard from Lucy. Stanley and Anna Grace are in the building." Morgan glanced at the television which was currently showing live coverage of the attack in D.C.  
He watched as the camera slowly panned from the hysterical parents being kept behind a police barricade to the flashing lights of emergency vehicles, to the black-suited agents stealthily making their way toward the building to the black smoke billowing in the blue sky. " _No_."

New Life Baptist Church in Washington D.C was eerily quiet now that the shooting had stopped. The joyful childish voices that brought such life to the building every morning had been silenced.

Nothing could have prepared the FBI agents for what they saw as they entered the building. The scent of blood and death hung heavy in the still air. It was like entering a warzone. Only instead of soldiers the battlefield was littered with the bodies of children.

For a moment the agents paused and stared.  
And then because they were agents they moved forward.  
Giving no thought to their personal safety or emotional well-being, they operated like a well-oiled machine as they began to clear the building and check the bullet-riddled bodies for pulses. As they moved forward the agents tagged the victims for the medics who were following behind them. Black tags for deceased, red for life-threatening injuries, yellow for critical, and green for non-critical injuries. With each new black tag, their despair grew.

Murdoch Jamison knelt down by the body of a five-year old boy. His mind quickly processed the fact that the small boy had been shot six times.  
"Hey, kiddo. How you doing?" The young agent's voice was soft as he checked for a pulse. His mind screamed at him that it was hopeless, but he had to try. Groaning out his anguish, Murdoch pulled out another black tag.  
"I am so sorry, buddy." He whispered as he tenderly brushed the boy's brown hair off his forehead. "You didn't deserve this, sweet boy."  
Murdoch looked around.  
A red lunch box had fallen open and the scent of peanut butter and jelly mixed sickeningly with the stench of blood. The boy's backpack had spilled open and the lifeless body was surrounded by crayons, pencils, crumpled papers, and toy dinosaurs.  
Picking up a well-worn stuffed dinosaur, Murdoch gently tucked it under the boy's limp arm. "There you go, buddy."

A faint sound reached Murdoch's ears, drawing his attention away from the sea of black and red tags. It sounded like crying. He glanced down the hallway; his blue eyes drawn to a storage closet.  
Murdoch hesitated. He knew he wasn't supposed to clear another room without backup, but the hope that there might be a survivor won out and the young agent slowly made his way toward the closet; his gun drawn.

Special Agent Murdoch Jamison drew in a deep breath as he stood outside the closet door. The sound of crying was clearer now. Murdoch tried to ignore the trail of blood leading to the door as he pulled it open; his gun held ready in front of him. His blue eyes widened and he quickly holstered his weapon and moved into the room.

Five-year old Stanley Manning was huddled against the wall, holding tightly to the bullet-riddled body of four-year old Anna Grace. _  
So much blood._ Murdoch shook the thought from his head and knelt down.  
"Stanley? Stanley, let me have Anna Grace."  
The little boy did not respond; his gaze fastened on the body of his friend.  
"Hey, Stan Little Man." Murdoch reached out and grasped the little boy's shoulder.  
Stanley looked up and stared at Murdoch without recognition. His green eyes haunted by things no child should ever have to see.  
"Stanley? It's Uncle Murdoch. Give me Anna Grace. Let me help her."

Murdoch eased the little girl away from Stanley and laid her on the floor.  
"Anna Grace? Hey, baby girl. Open your eyes for me, angel." The young agent brushed Anna Grace's blonde hair away from her face. Tears blurred his vision as he began CPR. "Don't you dare do this, Anna Grace. Wake up, baby. Please. Come on, angel. Breath. Please. _Please."_

Special Agent Joseph Davis rose wearily to his feet after placing another black tag by the body of a little girl. He gazed down for a moment at her red hair and sparkly princess shirt. Tears burned his dark eyes and he wanted nothing more than to leave this nightmare. But there was still a job to do.  
Joseph glanced around, trying to gauge how his agents were holding up. His guys were still working well; but as Joseph took in the haunted, dead eyes of his men, he wondered if any of them would truly survive this day.

Twenty-eight year-old Josiah Carter stepped up beside Joseph; his brown eyes wet with tears.  
"Any sign of Stanley and Anna Grace yet?" He asked quietly.  
Joseph shook his head; his eyes still on the body of the red-haired little girl.  
Josiah knelt down and carefully closed the lifeless blue eyes and covered her with a blanket one of the medics had handed him.  
Joseph watched as the young man pressed a kiss on the little girl's forehead before pulling the blanket over her face. He shook his head, surprised that the young man was able to cope after all he had witnessed during his first five years in the bureau.  
Josiah glanced around the hallway as he stood and frowned. "Where's Murdoch?"  
Joseph's eyes widened. "I thought he was with you."  
Josiah shook his head. "The last time I saw him he was checking that little boy." He nodded toward the black-tagged body of a small boy, clutching a stuffed dinosaur.

The two agents walked slowly over to the body; seeing so many victims, so many dead children at once, was physically weighing them down.  
Josiah paused. "Joseph, is that…?" His voice trailed off as he pointed at the floor.  
"A trail of blood." Joseph confirmed.  
There was so much blood everywhere it was hard to tell for certain. But this was different. It looked as though a body had been dragged.  
Drawing their guns, the two agents slowly followed the trail to the door of a storage closet.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Josiah nodded to Joseph and he swung open the closet door.  
For a moment time stood still as the heartbreaking scene was burned into their memory.

Five-year old Stanley was huddled on the floor; his shirt and hands covered with blood. There were tear streaks on the boy's face, but he was no longer crying.  
His dazed eyes stared at where Murdoch was frantically performing CPR on Anna Grace; his hands slick with her blood.

"Take Stanley." Josiah whispered.  
Joseph nodded and carefully lifted the unresponsive boy out of the closet.  
With Stanley out of the way Josiah knelt near Murdoch, ignoring the blood that soaked through his pant leg.  
"Murdoch." He choked out as tears streamed down his face. "She's gone, buddy." Josiah reached out and laid a hand on Murdoch's shoulder.  
"No!" The younger man shouted; his voice raw. He continued the frenetic CPR.  
"Come on, Anna Grace." Murdoch pleaded between breaths. "Breathe. _Breathe._ Please, baby girl. _Come on._ Breathe. Please, Sparkles. _Please._ "  
"Murdoch, stop. It's over, buddy. She's gone." Josiah tried to stop his friend's desperate movements. "Let me have her. It's over. She's gone."  
"No!" Murdoch gathered the tiny, broken body into his arms, shielding her from Josiah and began to rock her. "She's fine. She's fine." He murmured; pressing gentle kisses on Anna Grace's forehead and silky hair.

Josiah tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling as the pain ripped through him.  
"Murdoch. Hey, Einstein." He tilted his head in an attempt to make eye-contact. "It's me. It's Josiah."  
Murdoch stilled; his face still pressed into Anna Grace's hair. "Josiah?"  
"Yeah, buddy. Let me see Anna Grace for a minute, okay?"  
A long moment passed and then Murdoch loosened his grip on the little girl.  
Josiah reached out and took the lifeless body into his arms.  
He quickly turned away from Murdoch and pressed a kiss on Anna Grace's forehead. "I'm so sorry, angel. I love you, Miss Sparkles." Josiah whispered before passing the broken little body to the waiting medic.  
"No!"  
Josiah turned and caught Murdoch as he tried to reach Anna Grace again.  
"Murdoch, stop! You got to let her go, buddy. She's gone. Stop."  
The fight left the young man as he slumped in Josiah's arms; his wails of anguish echoing in the quiet church building.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Jade Leland set down her violin as the ringing of the doorbell echoed through the house. The unexpected sound made her heart race and she sighed, wondering if she would ever be free from the terror.  
"Come on, Beethoven." With the protective German shepherd at her side, Jade made her way to the door and peered through the peephole. She sighed in relief when she saw Lucy Davis standing on the front porch.

After unlocking the many locks, Jade pulled the heavy door open.  
"Hey." She said softly, taking in Lucy's tear-streaked face.  
"Hey." Lucy shifted four-month old Jasmine in her arms and tightened her hold on two-year old Josie's hand. "I'm sorry for just showing up. I just didn't want to be alone."  
Jade stepped back to let Lucy and the girls in. "I'm glad you came. Melody and Harmony are napping." Jade glanced at the clock. "They should be up soon."  
"Have you heard anything?" Lucy's voice trembled and she released Josie's hand to reach up and wipe away tears.  
"No. Myles promised to call as soon as there was news."

Special Agent Joseph Davis did not notice the blood drying on his clothes as he moved slowly toward the police barricade where so many parents were waiting for news on their children.  
Supervisor Demetrius Gans saw him first and his heart sunk as he took in the bloodied clothes and dazed, haunted gaze of the agent. _Lord, please no._ He prayed silently as he moved forward to meet the agent.

"Joseph?" D reached out and laid a hand on the younger man's shoulder, bringing him to a halt.  
Joseph stared at D for a moment before the shock faded from his dark eyes and was replaced by an incredible pain.

"Joseph!" Bobby, Tara, Jack, and Sue pushed their way past the barricade and surrounded their friend.  
"Did you find them?"  
"Stanley's over there." He gestured toward an ambulance parked outside the church. "He's not hurt."  
Relief flooded through Bobby and Tara, and yet something kept them from rushing to their son.  
They glanced at Jack and Sue before turning back to Joseph.  
His dark eyes had filled with tears.  
"No." Bobby shook his head.  
"Jack, Sue, I'm so sorry."  
 _"No._ " Jack's dark eyes pleaded with Joseph.  
"She's gone. Anna Grace is in heaven."  
" _NO_!" Sue's scream of anguish rent the stillness of the afternoon air as she collapsed in Jack's arms.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

 _"In Rama was there a voice heard, lamentation, and weeping, and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children, and would not be comforted, because they were not." Matthew 2:18_

Night had fallen. As the darkness deepened so did the despair in hearts around the world.  
The United States was a nation in mourning. Mourning for her children.  
As reports of the death toll had risen throughout the day all hope had disappeared. Simultaneous terrorist attacks had been carried out in ten states. 415 people had been killed. 292 children ages ranging from three-months to eighteen years and 123 adults had been gunned down in cold blood by Islamic terrorists. Six bombs had exploded.  
The world would never again be the same.

Jack and Sue Hudson operated on autopilot as they quietly moved through their dark house, laying their sleeping sons in bed. Exhaustion had won out for the boys and they had finally fallen asleep; their eyelashes still wet with tears. D and Donna had urged Jack and Sue to spend the night at their house, but they had wanted to go home.

Home.  
This morning their house had been a home; full of light, warmth, laughter, and love. Now it felt like just a house.  
Cold. Dark. Empty.  
The sparkle that had danced through their lives and bound them all together was gone.

Demetrius Gans held his weeping wife in his arms after calling and giving both of his college-age kids the news. The sound of their sobs still rang in his ears and he wanted nothing more than to hold them once again.

Myles Leland the Third sat in his leather recliner; silent tears sliding down his face as his wife's soft violin music drifted through the house. Eighteen-month old Melody and four-month old Harmony were asleep in his arms, but he could not bring himself to let them go.

Bobby Manning felt as though he would collapse from the weight of the pain pressing down upon him as he entered the living room after putting Robert and Kyra to bed.  
Tara was sitting on the couch with Stanley, whose eyes were still wide-open.  
He raised a questioning eyebrow at her and she shook her head. Bobby sighed heavily, feeling more helpless than he ever had before.  
Five-year old Stanley had not spoken one word since being found clutching the bloody, lifeless body of his friend.

Josiah Carter eyed his roommate with concern as they entered their dark apartment. He was afraid that this would be the blow that would finally crush the young man.  
"Hey, Einstein." He spoke softly. "You want to talk or watch a movie or something?"  
Murdoch shook his head and continued down the hallway toward his bedroom; each step seeming to be an effort.  
Josiah sighed. Hearing the lock click on his friend's door, he gave up and pulled on his running clothes; wondering if he could run fast enough to escape the memory of Anna Grace's lifeless body.

Spencer Reid slowly hung up his phone; tears filling and escaping his hazel eyes too quickly for him to control. He groaned and leaned over; his thin body shaking.  
"Reid?" Derek Morgan jumped up from his desk and hurried over.  
"What is it, kid?" He asked gently as the other BAU agents stopped their work and turned toward their friends in concern. Spencer gasped for breath and raised his head just enough for his voice to be heard.  
"Anna Grace is gone."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

Derek Morgan yawned as he parked in front of the house he had restored and given to Spencer and Tory for their wedding. He and Savannah shared a long driveway with the young couple which made carpooling easier. And though they wouldn't admit it to their wives, the guys rested easier when they were away, knowing that their ladies were close to each other and well-protected by the three dogs they shared.

Yawning again, Morgan pulled an extra key ring out of his pocket and unlocked Tory's car.  
"Get out of the way, Mocha." Derek gently pushed the German shepherd to the side and leaned in the car to unhook the two car seats.

Morgan had just finished buckling the two infant seats into the backseat of his car when Spencer came out the front door; four-month old Derek cradled on one arm and a heavy diaper bag hanging from his shoulder.  
Morgan gave a slight smile at the sight of Reid with the baby.  
It was something he had begun to think he would never see. But he had to admit that his friend was a natural father.  
Derek could only hope that he would do as well when his turn came.  
He glanced back down the driveway in the direction of his house where he had just said goodbye to Savannah. It was hard to believe that in a month's time they would have their own little one.

"Morning, Pretty Boy." Morgan said softly, taking in the dark circles under the red-rimmed eyes of the younger man.  
It was obvious that the night had been hard.  
"Good morning." Reid's voice was quiet and strained and Morgan briefly wondered if he had slept at all.  
Though he couldn't blame him if hadn't; Morgan's own brief sleep had been tormented and interrupted by terrifying nightmares and heartbreaking memories of the little girl they were going to bury.

Blinking back tears, Morgan nodded toward the infant. "How's Baby Pretty Boy doing?"  
Reid rolled his eyes. "You need to come up with a shorter nickname for him."  
"I know. Here," Morgan held out eager hands. "Let me take him while you grab the rest of your gear."  
Reid handed the baby over and slid the diaper bag into the backseat before heading back to the house; Mocha trotting at his heels.

Morgan shifted the baby in his arms and gazed down into the innocent dark eyes. Tears blurred his vision. The dark brown eyes reminded him so much of Anna Grace.  
Sighing heavily, Morgan pressed a kiss on the soft forehead. "Hey, little Derek." He whispered. "Let's get you in your seat, okay?"

The front door of the house opened again as Morgan finished fastening the last buckle on baby Derek's car seat. He straightened and watched the young couple.  
Reid set the large suitcase he was carrying on the front porch and shifted one-week old Gideon to his other arm as he set the alarm and locked the door.  
Tory walked toward the car, carrying a canvas bag that appeared to contain nothing but diapers.  
Morgan hurried forward and took the bag from her.  
"Hey, sweetheart." He whispered, draping an arm around her shoulders and pressing a kiss on her red hair. "You okay?" Tory nodded silently and leaned into the car to check the straps on Derek's car seat.

Minutes later they were on the road headed to D.C.

It was time to say goodbye to Anna Grace.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Jack sighed as he tried once again to hand James to Donna.  
The eight-month old wailed and clenched Jack's shirt with a seemingly superhuman strength. "Issy!" He cried; unable to understand why his sister wasn't there.  
"James, it's okay, buddy." Jack stroked the infant's back soothingly.  
James burrowed himself into Jack's shoulder.  
"Here." Sue popped a pacifier into the baby's mouth as Jack swayed back and forth, trying to sooth him.  
He looked at Donna. "I'm sorry. He didn't sleep well last night. I know he doesn't know what's going on, but…" Jack's voice faltered and his gaze dropped to the floor as he struggled against the tears.  
Donna laid a comforting hand on Jack's arm. "It is all right, Jack. Babies can sense when something is wrong. James will probably be clingy for a while."

Six-year old Jackson and five-year old Wesley watched the scene from the couch with tear-filled eyes.  
"Daddy?" Jackson's voice was quiet and subdued.  
Jack turned toward him. "What, buddy?"  
"Can we go with you? Please?"  
Wesley hiccupped on a sob. "Please, don't leave us."  
Jack groaned quietly and turned to Sue, but she had zoned out again; lost in her own silent world of pain.  
Kissing the curly dark hair of the shuddering infant in his arms, Jack looked at Donna. "I don't know what to do." He whispered hoarsely; his dark chocolate eyes pleading for help.  
Donna's eyes filled with tears as she studied the young man standing in front of her. He was clearly torn. It was obvious that Jack didn't want to be separated from his sons right now any more than they wanted to be separated from him. But should a six-year old and five-year old be present for the choosing of their sister's coffin and grave site?  
Donna sighed. She didn't know what to tell Jack. She glanced over at Jackson and Wesley. The poor things looked exhausted.

Donna walked over to the couch and knelt in front of it.  
"Hey, guys. Your Daddy and Mama will be back soon. They have some things they need to do. And I need your help. Tanya and Davy are coming home from college and I have to get ready. Can you help me while we wait for your Daddy and Mama?"  
Donna knew that the Hudson boys would normally do _anything_ if they thought they were helping someone. But this time they both shook their heads.  
Wesley leaned against his brother; tears hanging from his dark eyelashes. "P-Please, Daddy. Don't g-go."  
Donna's heart broke. "Take them with you, Jack. They need you."  
She glanced at the face of the quiet baby in Jack's arms. "James is asleep. You can leave him here." Donna gestured toward the playpen set up in the corner of the living room. "I'll pack the boys some snacks."

Jack carefully lowered James down into the playpen and stroked his curly black hair until he settled down into a deep sleep. He crossed the room to join Sue and took her hand into his.  
She startled at the touch.  
"Sue, James is asleep. We're taking the boys with us."  
Confusion filled her hazel eyes.  
"They need us." Jack pointed to the two teary-eyed boys and Sue gave a slight nod.

Donna returned carrying a drawstring bag loaded with snacks and juice. She handed it to Sue.  
"Thank you for everything, Donna." Jack spoke softly.  
She reached out and hugged him tightly for a brief moment. "You're welcome, Jack."

Jack turned back to the couch. "Come on, boys. Let's go."  
Silent tears slid down Donna's cheeks as she watched the Hudson family quietly leave; preparing to go choose a casket for their little angel.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Pastor Logan Emerson sat unmoving on his couch, watching the clock as the minutes slowly ticked by. His church had lost thirty members.  
Twenty-five children and five adults. The terrorist attack had left a gaping hole in the church family that would never be fully healed. Today he had preformed three funerals. Numbers five, six, and seven since the attack. Tomorrow would be the hardest funeral of all.  
Tomorrow they would bury Anna Grace Hudson.

Logan groaned and leaned forward, burying his face in his hands. In his twenty years of pastoring, he had endured many difficult times and had seen much heartbreak. But nothing could compare with this.  
In the short four years of her life, Anna Grace had impacted so many lives. And now she was gone. Brutally murdered for the simple fact that she had been born in America to a Christian family.  
Logan Emerson wondered how he could help his church members hold on to their faith when his own seemed to be slipping away.

Derek Morgan woke long before his alarm sounded. Giving up on sleep, he got up and made coffee. Morgan read his Bible while drinking his coffee and tried to pray, but there were no words. Morgan felt like he was moving in a fog as he slowly showered and he briefly wondered if it was all a dream.  
A terrible nightmare brought on by the atrocities he witnessed every single day. But then the pain in his heart intensified and he knew that it was all true.  
Anna Grace was gone.

Spencer Reid moved quietly around the hotel room, trying not to disturb his sleeping wife.  
He glanced in the playpen and groaned when he saw four-month old Derek staring up at him with wide eyes.  
"You're supposed to be asleep, buddy." Reid reached into the playpen and stroked the baby's eyebrows with a long finger, but Derek squirmed away.  
"Okay. Come here." Reid sighed and lifted the baby into his arms. He raised his eyebrows. "Ah, so that's what's wrong. Come on, let's get you changed."

"Spencer?" Tory raised herself up on her elbows and blinked sleepily as she watched Reid changing Derek's diaper.  
"It's still early, honey. Go back to sleep."  
Tory glanced at the second playpen where Gideon was starting to stir. "Gideon will need to eat soon."  
Tory shoved her pillow up against the headboard and leaned against it. "Did you sleep at all?"  
Reid turned to face her; a dry Derek cradled on one arm. The dark, heavy circles under his eyes gave Tory her answer.  
She sighed and glanced at the clock. "We have time. Lay back down and get some sleep, Spencer."  
He dropped his gaze to the floor and shook his head. "I can't."  
Tory recognized the haunted expression on his face and knew that he was afraid to face the nightmares that waited for him. She blinked back tears, wondering if they would survive this.  
Could any of them survive without Anna Grace?


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

Pastor Logan Emerson stood in the long hallway of the funeral home, watching as the staff moved around quietly preparing for the arrival of the family. For him the hardest moments of being a pastor were watching a family enter a viewing room and see their loved one lying in the coffin for the first time. But this time he was just as worried about his own reaction as that of the family.  
He didn't know how he was going to handle seeing four-year old Anna Grace Hudson in a coffin.

Logan leaned against the wall and prayed silently for strength as he allowed the memories of the angel they had loved and lost to wash over him.

The sound of a car door shutting drew Logan Emerson out of his thoughts.  
The pastor watched through a window as Jack and Sue Hudson exited their vehicle. Jack slid open the back door of the van and leaned in. Moments later he straightened with eight-month old James in his arms. Sue reached for the baby and Jack handed him over.  
As six-year old Jackson and five-year old Wesley emerged from the van a line of five cars slowly pulled into the parking lot and parked next to the Hudson vehicle. Pastor Emerson watched as the rest of Anna Grace's "family" emerged from their cars. Even from a distance he could see the grief that was weighing them down.

The group gathered in the hallway of the funeral home; their eyes darting nervously to the door of the viewing room where they knew Anna Grace lay.

The funeral director approached the huddled group and whispered a few words to Jack.  
He nodded and glanced at Sue.  
Derek Morgan stepped forward; his dark eyes already wet with tears. "I'll take the baby, Sue."  
She nodded wordlessly and handed the infant over.  
Jack knelt in front of the two boys clinging to his legs. "Hey, guys. I need you to wait out here. I'll come get you in minute." He kissed their foreheads. "It's okay. I love you."

Pastor Emerson entered the viewing room and his breath caught when he got a glimpse of the lifeless body of Anna Grace. He looked away quickly; his eyes filled with tears.  
The door opened and Jack and Sue came in. Hand-in-hand they slowly made their way to the coffin where their little girl laid.

"No! Anna Grace!" Sue's anguished cry echoed in the room and she dropped to her knees.  
Jack followed her to the floor; his arms wrapped tightly around her. Tears streamed down his face as his body jerked with silent, helpless sobs.  
Logan Emerson rushed forward and knelt next to the weeping couple, wrapping his arms around them. "She's with Jesus." He murmured. "Anna Grace is safe with Jesus."

Outside Sue's cry was heard and the tears they had fought so valiantly began to fall.  
"Mama." Five-year old Wesley raised tear-filled brown eyes to the adults around him, pleading for help.  
Murdoch stepped forward and lifted the little boy into his arms. Josiah followed him and picked up Jackson.  
Morgan walked a short distance away, cradling James. He wanted to be strong for his friends; his family, but the pain tearing at his heart was greater than any he had ever known. How were they supposed to survive this?

One hour into the two-hour long viewing, Bobby Manning leaned exhaustedly against the wall and watched as a steady stream of people continued to flow into the small room where Anna Grace's "family" had gathered.

Amazement filled him. He had known that Anna Grace was special, but he had not realized how many lives the four-year old had managed to touch. From church to Little Bookworm club to speech class to doctors and nurses to the FBI; the little girl's sphere of influence seemed to know no bounds.

"Has Stanley said anything yet?"  
Bobby looked up to see Derek Morgan standing beside him; his face still damp from the tears he had shed.  
"Not a word." Bobby let his head fall back against the wall.  
"I know he might need professional help, but he doesn't do well with strangers. We were hoping to have Murdoch talk to him, but…" Bobby shrugged. "He's not saying much either. I'm as worried about him as I am about Stanley. Maybe more so."  
Morgan followed Bobby's gaze to where the youngest agent sat in a chair; Josiah and Spencer standing silently behind him. A small smile tugged at the corners of Morgan's mouth at Reid's protectiveness of the younger genius.  
"Do you want me and Reid to talk to him?"  
"To Stanley or Murdoch?"  
Derek shrugged. "We can do both. But I was referring to Stanley."  
Bobby turned and studied his friend's compassionate face. He nodded. "I would appreciate that, mate."  
Morgan patted Bobby's shoulder; he caught Reid's eye and tilted his head for the younger man to follow him.  
Spencer squeezed Murdoch's shoulder and followed Derek to the small sofa where Wesley, Robert, and Stanley were sitting, silently watching everything around them.  
Donna Gans stood nearby, cradling a sleeping James.  
"Stanley, come with me, buddy." Derek picked up the nearly catatonic little boy and carried him from the room.

Bobby watched Derek and Spencer leave with Stanley then glanced around the viewing room. He frowned when he realized that Jackson was nowhere to be seen. Slipping quietly from the room, Bobby headed down the long hallway in search of the hurting little boy.

Bobby was just about to ask a funeral home worker if she had seen Jackson when he heard sobbing coming from a dark room. Bobby entered the room and turned on a lamp; bathing it in a soft light. What he saw shattered his already broken heart even more.

Six-year old Jackson was huddled on the floor in a corner of the room. His face was buried on his raised knees; his entire body jerking with sobs.  
"Aw, Sparky Jr." Bobby murmured, tears filling his green eyes. He crossed the room and knelt down.  
"Hey," Bobby ran a hand over the little boy's curly black hair. "Jackson, come on, buddy. I know it hurts. But it's going to be okay. Anna Grace wouldn't want you to be this sad."  
The little boy cried harder. "I-I'm sorry," he gasped out. "I-m s-sorry."

Bobby frowned. "What are you sorry for, kiddo?"  
"I-it's m-my f-fault. I'm sorry! I didn't mean to. I'm s-sorry."  
"Hey, hey. None of this is your fault, Sparky Jr. Jackson, look at me. Come on."  
Bobby nudged the little boy's head up. "This is not your fault."  
"Yes, it is!" Jackson's hazel eyes were filled with a desperation and guilt Bobby had never before seen in a child.

"I wasn't there! It's _my_ fault. I was supposed to be there. But w-we handcuffed Declan and got into trouble. I wasn't there. I-I didn't protect my sister. It's my fault. I didn't p-protect her. I'm sorry. I-I'm s-sorry." Jackson's head dropped back to his knees as the sobs overtook him again.  
Tears spilled from Bobby's eyes. He knew that Jackson had inherited both Jack and Sue's overdeveloped sense of responsibility and blame, resulting in a burden much too heavy for any six-year old to carry.

"Jackson," Bobby paused and sent up a silent prayer for help. He was in over his head.  
How do you explain to a six-year old that terrorists were responsible for his little sister's death?  
"Jackson, listen to me. None of this is your fault, buddy. There is nothing you could have done even if you had been there. It's not your fault. Bad men killed Anna Grace because they didn't know Jesus.  
I don't understand why this happened, Jackson, but there are a few things that I _do_ know. I know that this was _not_ your fault. I know that you were a great big brother to Anna Grace. You made her happy.  
I know that Anna Grace is with Jesus right now. She's safe and happy. She'll never be sad, or sick, or hurt, or scared again. I know that we'll see her again in heaven one day. I know that it's okay for us to be sad and to cry because we miss her, but that Anna Grace wouldn't want us to stay sad.  
I know that I love you, Sparky Jr. Your parents and your brothers love you. None of this is your fault. Okay? Come here." Jackson raised his head and lifted his arms.  
Bobby sat on the floor and pulled the little boy onto his lap.  
Jackson laid a small hand over his heart. "It hurts here, Uncle Bobby."  
Bobby closed his eyes. "I know it does, Sparky Jr. I know."


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

"Hey, Stanley." Derek Morgan used the gentle voice he had perfected over the years when speaking to victims and witnesses. He knelt down in front of the unresponsive boy. "I know that today is a sad day, but we really need your help with something. Stanley, we need you to tell us what happened in the church when the bad men came in."

For the first time in four days Stanley reacted to his surroundings. His body began to shake and he shook his head violently. "Hey, hey. Easy. It's okay." Morgan reached out to the little boy, but he jumped back.  
The five-year old's eyes darted frantically around the room and he dove under a nearby table; his knees drawn up to his chest, his back pressed against the wall.

Morgan and Reid shared a concerned glance. They had seen their share of victims who were so traumatized they never escaped the memories. The thought of the intelligent five-year old spending the rest of his life trapped in the horror he had witnessed was heartrending.  
But all the signs were there. If they didn't reach Stanley soon, they would lose him forever.

Reid glanced around the room. He hurried over to a small table and pulled open a drawer to reveal a stack of paper and box of crayons.  
Armed with the paper and crayons, Spencer knelt down again in front of the table where Stanley was hiding.  
"Stanley," The young man spoke quietly, keeping his voice gentle. "It's okay. No one is going to hurt you. You're safe, Stanley."  
Reid hesitated slightly. "And no one is mad at you. You don't have to talk if you don't want to. Okay?"  
He waited until the little boy gave a slight nod.  
"Okay." Reid gave the boy a gentle smile. He held out the paper and crayons. "Do you think that you could draw a few pictures for us?"  
A long minute stretched by and finally Stanley raised his head from his knees and nodded, reaching for the paper.

Reid and Morgan sat silently on the floor for ten minutes while Stanley drew.  
Finally the little boy crawled out from under the table and handed the papers back to Reid. He passed them to Morgan and wrapped an arm around Stanley.  
"You did great, Stanley." Reid whispered.

Derek flipped through the pictures; tears blurring his vision as he saw the horror of the terrorist attack through the childish drawings of an innocent five-year old.  
He swallowed hard. "Stanley, do you think you could tell us about your pictures?"  
The little boy tensed under Reid's arm. His green eyes darted around the room.  
"It's okay." Spencer spoke softly. "It's just us. You don't have to talk if you don't want to. But it would help us if you could tell us about your pictures."

The men waited silently. After what seemed like an eternity the five-year old sighed heavily and leaned against Reid.  
For the first time since he had been found in the storage closet cradling Anna Grace's bullet-riddled body, Stanley opened his mouth and began to speak.

"It was time to go outside." The little boy's voice was hoarse from lack of use. "But the big kids were making volcanoes out of baking soda and vinegar and I wanted to help. So, they let me stay inside. Robert, Jackson, and Wesley got in trouble outside and Mama and Aunt Sue had to come get them."

Stanley's small body shuddered violently and Reid tightened his arm around the little boy.  
"It was reading time. W-we were sitting on the story rug."  
Stanley's voice began to shake. "I-it was supposed to be q-quiet. But we heard noises. Yelling. Men y-yelling. Then b-banging noises. No one knew what it w-was. But I knew. It was g-guns. Miss J-Jennifer told everyone to get in the c-closet and to be real q-quiet. But A-Anna G-Grace was in speech class. And sh-she couldn't hear the g-guns. So I ran out the door to find her."

The little boy's body was shaking uncontrollably now. "T-here were m-men with g-guns in the h-hallway. T-they were yelling."  
Stanley's eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "Allah…"  
"Allah Akbar?" Reid asked softly.  
Stanley sniffed and nodded. "T-they w-were shooting people. I ran down the hallway. They didn't s-see me. A-Anna G-Grace w-wasn't in the s-speech room. S-she was in the hallway. B-blood everywhere. I-I dragged her to the closet and hid. I tried to help her. Tried to s-stop the blood. There was too much!" Stanley's voice choked.  
For the first time the five-year old began to cry; his small body jerking convulsively with the force of the sobs tearing out of him.

Reid quickly pulled the little boy onto his lap as Morgan reached out and stroked his dark brown hair.  
"Shh. It's alright, Stanley. You did good, little man. You were so brave. There was nothing else you could have done, Stanley. Shh. It's okay. Anna Grace is okay. She's with Jesus."

Derek and Spencer looked at each other over the head of the sobbing little boy. Their eyes wet with tears. The dam had been broken. Now the long healing process could begin for Stanley Manning.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: Song lyrics are not mine.

 **Chapter Thirteen**

 _"_ _This is not at all how we thought it was supposed_

 _To be. We had so many plans for you;_

 _We had so many dreams._

 _But now you've gone away and left us with the_

 _Memories of your smile._

 _And nothing we can say and nothing we can do_

 _Can take away the pain, the pain of losing you._

 _But we can cry with hope_

 _Say goodbye with hope_

 _'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end._

 _And we can grieve with hope_

 _'Cause we believe with hope_

 _There's a place where we'll see your face again._

 _And never have I known anything so hard to_

 _Understand. And never have I questioned more_

 _The wisdom of God's plan._

 _But through the cloud of tears_

 _I see the Father smile and say 'Well done.'_

 _And I imagine you where you wanted most to be._

 _Seeing all your dreams come true_

 _'Cause now you're home and now you're free._

 _And we can cry with hope_

 _Say goodbye with hope_

 _'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end._

 _And we can grieve with hope_

 _'Cause we believe with hope_

 _There's a place where we'll see your face again._

 _We have this hope as an anchor._

 _'Cause we believe that everything_

 _God promised us is true._

 _So we can cry with hope_

 _Say goodbye with hope_

 _'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end._

 _And we can grieve with hope_

 _'Cause we believe with hope_

 _There's a place_

 _By God's grace_

 _There's a place where we'll see your face_

 _We'll see your face again._

 _So we can cry with hope_

 _Say goodbye with hope_

 _We wait with hope_

 _And we ache with hope_

 _We hold on with hope_

 _We let go with hope."_

A muffled wail drew Bobby's attention away from the slideshow full of precious memories of Anna Grace. He glanced down the pew and saw Murdoch lean forward, his face buried in his hands.  
For the first time Bobby realized that Murdoch Jamison had no hope. He was the only one who had no hope of ever seeing Anna Grace again. No comfort in knowing that she was safe in the arms of Jesus.  
The tears that had been building in Bobby's green eyes spilled out onto his face. His own pain was beyond words, but he could not even begin to imagine the hopeless anguish the young man was facing.

As the song ended Pastor Logan Emerson slowly made his way to the pulpit; his face wet with tears despite his efforts to hold them in. He wiped his eyes and cleared his throat before speaking.  
"We are gathered here today to say goodbye to Anna Grace Hudson. Anna Grace wasn't with us long. Only four years. But she packed more life and love into those short years than many people experience in a full lifetime. Anna Grace left behind her parents, Jack and Sue Hudson, her brothers, Jackson, Wesley, and James, and a whole slew of adopted aunts, uncles, and cousins whose lives she brightened with her smile.  
Anna Grace was always smiling. I was trying to remember the other day if I ever saw her unhappy and I couldn't think of a time when I did. Anna Grace was diagnosed as being completely deaf when she was three months old, but she never let that slow her down. She packed life, laughter, and love into every minute.  
Anna Grace enjoyed cheering for her big brothers at their soccer and baseball games. Jackson, Wesley,"  
The pastor looked at the two teary-eyed boys and gave them a tender smile. "Anna Grace was your biggest fan and I believe she is looking forward to watching your next game from the best seat in the world, heaven.  
She loved mothering her baby brother, James, and would do _anything_ to make him smile.  
Anna Grace loved to sing and dance and she loved Jesus. She told everyone she met that Jesus loved them and that they needed to love Jesus too. More than anything in this world, Anna Grace wanted everyone to know and love Jesus. She would not want anyone to leave here today without having the hope we just heard about in the song.  
The hope of heaven. The hope of seeing Anna Grace again.  
The hope that is only possible because of the cross of Jesus Christ."

Myles Leland shifted slightly in his seat. His eyes connected with Bobby's and he knew that his partner was thinking the same thing he was.  
Myles glanced toward Murdoch. The only one in their "family" without that hope.  
Even across the distance that separated them, Myles could feel the pain and anger radiating from the young man. He closed his eyes briefly and silently pleaded with God to do a work in Murdoch's life, that Anna Grace's death would not be in vain.

 _"Heaven is the face of a little girl_

 _With dark brown eyes that disappear when she_

 _Smiles. Heaven is the place where she calls my name_

 _Says, 'Daddy, please come play with me for awhile.'_

 _God, I know it's all of this and so much more._

 _But God, You know that this is what I'm aching for._

 _God, You know I just can't see beyond the door._

 _So right now_

 _Heaven is the sound of her breathing deep_

 _Lying on my chest falling fast asleep while I sing._

 _And Heaven is the weight of her in my arms_

 _Being there to keep her safe from harm while she_

 _Dreams._

 _And God, I know it's all of this and so much more._

 _But God, You know that this is what I'm longing for_

 _And God, You know I just can't see beyond the door._

 _But in my mind's eye I can see a place_

 _Where Your glory fills every empty space_

 _All the cancer is gone_

 _Every mouth is fed_

 _And there's no one left in the orphan's bed_

 _Every lonely heart finds their one true love_

 _And there's no more goodbye_

 _And no more not enough_

 _And no more enemy_

 _No more._

 _Heaven is a sweet maple syrup kiss_

 _And a thousand other little things I miss_

 _With her gone._

 _Heaven is the place where she takes my hand_

 _And leads me to You_

 _And we both run into Your arms._

 _Oh, God, I know it's so much more than I can dream._

 _It's far beyond anything I can conceive._

 _So, God, You know I'm trusting You until I see_

 _Heaven in the face of my little girl_

 _Heaven in the face of my little girl."_

Jack Hudson moved his arm from Sue's shoulders and covered his face as his body quaked with silent sobs.  
He had failed. He had failed his little girl. He had not kept her safe from harm and now he would never be able to protect her again.  
Would never again hear her sweet, lisping voice or see her beautiful smile. Never again be awakened by her giggle and slobbery kisses.  
Would never dance with her again.  
Jack moaned quietly and sat up, rubbing his arms. They physically ached to feel the precious weight of his little girl resting in them.

 _"You're in a better place;_

 _I've heard a thousand times._

 _And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you_

 _But the reason why I'm broken;_

 _The reason why I cry_

 _Is how long must I wait to be with you._

 _I close my eyes and I see your face_

 _If home's where my heart is than I'm out of place._

 _Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through_

 _Somehow. I've never been more homesick than now._

 _Help me, Lord, 'cause I don't understand Your ways_

 _The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know_

 _But even if you showed me;_

 _The hurt would be the same_

 _'Cause I'm still here so far away from home._

 _I close my eyes and I see your face_

 _If home's where my heart is than I'm out of place_

 _Lord, won't You give me strength to make it through somehow._

 _I've never been more homesick than now._

 _In Christ there are no goodbyes._

 _And in Christ there is no end._

 _So I hold onto Jesus with all that I am_

 _To see you again; to see you again._

 _And I close my eyes and I see your face_

 _If home's where my heart is than I'm out of place_

 _Lord, won't You give me strength to make it through somehow._

 _Won't You give me strength to make it through somehow?_

 _Won't You give me strength to make it through somehow?_

 _I've never been more homesick; than now."_


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

It was late. The funeral was long over.  
As Demetrius Gans entered the Hoover Building he tried to push away the thought of Anna Grace lying cold and lifeless under the ground.  
Leaning against the elevator wall, he instead forced himself to imagine the four-year old adding her sparkle to the beauty of heaven.

Despite the lateness of the hour, the Hoover Building was full and alive with bustling agents. No one was willing to go home. Not when there were still so many unanswered questions. Not when their beloved country had once again been attacked within her own borders.  
The intense urgency with which the agents worked surpassed even that of the days that followed September 11, 2001. Though this attack had resulted in fewer deaths it seemed worse than the horrific attacks of 9/11.  
For this attack had targeted the most innocent of Americans.  
Her precious children.

D brushed the tears from his face and forced himself to stand tall as he exited the elevator. He knew that he wasn't expected back at work yet, but he needed to be here. Needed to see with his own eyes that everything possible was being done to find answers. To ensure that America's children would never again be the target of terrorists.

D stopped short when he saw Murdoch Jamison working intently in the empty bullpen.  
 _What is he doing here?_ A part of D knew that he shouldn't be surprised to find the young man hard at work, but he had wondered if Murdoch would ever be able to return to work.  
The young agent had appeared to be on the verge of collapse several times throughout the service.

Demetrius walked quietly into the bullpen, his eyes wandering over the empty desks.  
For a moment he was nearly overwhelmed by the wealth of memories that lived in this room.

It was here that he had almost destroyed his marriage. It was here that he had weighed the decision to walk away from everything he had spent his life for in an attempt to save that marriage.

It was here that he had received the devastating news of the death of his unborn daughter. His youngest child. A child he continued to long for each and every day.

This room had witnessed lives destroyed and others put back together.  
It was where terrorist attacks had been stopped and where he had to tell his friends that their children had become the victims of the most senseless terrorist act yet.

With all the victories won in this room and all the defeats suffered, Demetrius found himself once again wondering if this would be the loss that would destroy all they had.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

Demetrius stopped in surprise when he caught a glimpse of what was on Murdoch's computer screen. He couldn't read the Arabic that the young man was studying intently, but D recognized the seal at the top of the document. It assigned the document one of the highest levels of classification.  
 _How did he get access to that?_ D shook his head, wondering once more what secrets his young and often mysterious agent held.

"Murdoch." D frowned when the young man nearly jumped out of his seat. He had never seen the normally hyper-vigilant agent so unaware of his surroundings before.  
D held up a hand. "It's just me."  
Demetrius nearly took a step backward at the depth of raw pain in Murdoch's blue eyes. He realized that with that heartbreaking lost look on his boyish face, Murdoch could probably gain access to any document he wanted. Anyone with a shred of humanity left in them would do _anything_ to ease the hopeless pain in those piercing blue eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Demetrius asked softly, cautiously approaching his youngest agent.  
"I have to work." Murdoch's voice was hoarse as he turned back to his computer screen.  
D's eyes fell on the empty energy drink bottle and he wondered how long it had been since Murdoch had slept.  
The young man seemed to rarely sleep even at the best of times and the past few days had been the worst of times.

"You don't need to work now. You have the rest of the week off."  
Murdoch didn't respond, instead he continued to scroll through the Arabic document; his blue eyes moving at lightning speed as his incredible mind soaked in the information.  
"Murdoch, come one." D laid a hand on the young man's shoulder. "You don't need to do this. Your team isn't working this case."  
Murdoch jerked away, his reading becoming almost frantic.  
D sighed and rubbed a hand over his face; wishing that someone else with more experience in dealing directly with the young genius was there.

"I have to find it." Murdoch muttered.  
"Find what?"  
"I have to find what I missed." Murdoch's voice grew panicky.  
D frowned. "Murdoch, what are talking about?"  
"I have to find what I missed! The chatter. What would have stopped the attack. I missed it."  
D closed his eyes. "Murdoch, no." He groaned. "You didn't miss anything. There was no chatter, Murdoch. It took everyone by surprise. You didn't miss anything."  
D tried to turn the young man away from the computer but he jerked away.  
"I'm the only one in this unit who speaks and reads Arabic. I'm the liaison with the anti-terrorist unit. It's my job to stay on top of the chatter. I missed it! It's my fault."  
Murdoch's voice trailed off to a broken whisper as he began reading the information on his computer screen again.  
"No, Murdoch. You didn't miss anything. This is _not_ your fault."

D tried again to pull the young man away from the computer, but it was useless. Murdoch was no longer even aware of his presence. He was completely consumed by the Arabic characters filling his computer screen.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Jack Hudson found himself wandering aimlessly around the eerily quiet house. He couldn't shake the nagging feeling that there was something he needed to do. As he flipped on the light and glanced around the spotless kitchen once again the realization hit him like a ton of bricks and he dropped into an empty chair as gut-wrenching sobs tore out of his body.

The last of the guests had left and he and Sue had tucked their exhausted children into bed.  
Three of them. Not four. Three precious little boys.  
And that was why Jack could not escape the nagging, restless feeling that there was still something he needed to do. He had not tucked in his little girl. Hadn't danced with her. Hadn't brushed her silky blonde hair. Had not shared sweet kisses with her before depositing her safely in her mother's arms for bedtime cuddles and prayers.

Jack slid out of his chair and curled on the floor as his sobs turned to heartbroken wails at the realization that he would never do those things again.  
"God, help me!" Jack gasped out. "Please, help me!"  
And as though God Himself was holding him close Jack felt his pain ease enough for him to uncurl himself from the floor and stand.

He slowly made his way up the stairs, pausing to check on each of the sleeping boys.  
His heart clenched painfully when he saw the tear stains on six-year old Jackson's cheeks. The little boy had cried himself to sleep every night since his sister's death.

Jack hesitated outside Anna Grace's door; tears blurred his vision as he forced himself to move past his little girl's room without stopping for the first time in four years.

The sound of movement inside the room stopped Jack in his tracks. His heart pounded as a wild hope filled him. _Maybe all this was just a terrible nightmare. Maybe his little girl was sleeping soundly behind the closed door._  
Trembling with hope, Jack pushed open the door. His heart stopped.

Anna Grace was not there.

Sue was curled on their daughter's bed; her body quaking with sobs. In one hand she clutched Anna Grace's favorite purple blanket. Jack's hope collapsed as tears once again spilled from his dark eyes.  
Wordlessly, Jack crossed the room and gathered Sue into his arms.

Their tears mingled together and dropped onto their little girl's bed


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

Jack Hudson laid awake in bed, counting down the hours and minutes until his alarm would sound. Today was the day. The day he would return to work. The day he was expected to begin returning to normalcy.  
After all it had been two weeks.  
Two weeks since they had taken the light of his life, his _only_ daughter, and laid her in the ground.  
But would this life they were now living ever become normal?

Would it ever become normal to tuck three children in at night instead of four? To fix only three bowls of oatmeal? To see the faces of three precious boys around the table, but no little girl?  
Would it become normal to watch his six-year old son cry himself to sleep every night, longing for the baby sister he would never see again?  
Would it one day be normal to have his wife leave their bed each night to sleep on their daughter's cold, empty bed?  
To find his sons curled up on the floor of their sister's room, their long lashes wet with tears?

Or would these things one day end? Would they learn to eat, sleep, smile, and even laugh again as their pastor had said when he tried to convince Jack to come to church?

Brushing away the tears blurring his vision, Jack stared once more at his alarm clock. Sighing heavily, he reached out and shut it off, swinging his legs to the floor.  
Jack wasn't sure he wanted those things to end. Would smiling and laughing again mean that they had somehow forgotten Anna Grace?

Jack shook his head, knowing that he would never forget the blonde-haired, brown-eyed angel who had completely stolen his heart from the moment he first heard her heart beat.  
 _But what about Jackson, Wesley, and James?_ They had captured his heart too. _Didn't they deserve a happy childhood?  
_ A few tears escaped Jack's control as he pictured Jackson and Wesley's teary, sad eyes.

It seemed as though the terrorists had not just killed Anna Grace, but the entire Hudson family.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

Demetrius Gans was up long before his alarm went off. He sat at the kitchen island with a cup of coffee and his Bible.  
Today Jack Hudson would be returning to work.  
D sipped the steaming coffee and sighed, wondering if the younger man would be ready. At one time, he would never have doubted Jack's ability to overcome any obstacle while remaining one of the best agents the bureau had ever had. But now he wasn't so sure.

In the two weeks following Anna Grace's funeral, Jack and Sue had withdrawn from everyone.  
When Jack had first pleaded with D for privacy and time alone with his family to focus on the boys, D had understood and passed the word along to the rest of his agents.  
But when first Myles, then Bobby, Josiah, Joseph, Lucy, Tara, and Jade reported that Jack and Sue were refusing to even answer any phone calls, D's concern had grown.  
But he had not been really worried about the survival of the Hudson family until Bobby had appeared at the doorway of his office Monday morning, his green eyes glistening with tears.

Closing his eyes, D thought back to the disturbing conversation.

 _Demetrius was working at his desk when a quiet knock brought his eyes to the door. His heart sank when he saw Bobby leaning tiredly against the doorway; tears shining in his sad eyes._

 _"Bobby." D's voice was filled with the warmth of years of friendship. "Come on in, buddy. Have a seat."  
D watched as Bobby dropped dejectedly into a chair across from the desk. Frowning, he circled his desk and perched on the edge of it. _

_"How can I help you, Bobby?"  
"I don't know." Bobby rubbed a hand over his face.  
"How's Stanley doing?"  
Bobby shrugged. "A little better, I guess. Jade's working with him. Started him on piano lessons; teaching him to express himself through music." Bobby shrugged again. "I wasn't sure of the whole music therapy thing, but it does seem to calm him. And Murdoch has taken both the boys out a couple of times. Not sure what he does, but it helps them."  
D nodded, thinking of the irony that Murdoch seemed able to help everyone except himself._

 _"It's Jack." Bobby suddenly blurted.  
D frowned. "Jack?"  
Bobby sighed and dropped his forehead onto his fist. "I get they're wanting privacy, though refusing to even answer their phones is taking it a bit far. But they haven't been to church since it happened." Bobby's voice quivered.  
"Yesterday Pastor Emerson pulled me aside. Said he had gotten Jack on the phone Saturday. Jack hung up on him."  
Bobby raised anguished eyes to meet D's kind gaze. "That's not Jack."_

D shook the disturbing memory from his mind and covered his face with his hands. He could understand Jack and Sue not wanting to return to the church where their daughter was murdered, but it felt like something else was going on.  
If Jack and Sue lost their faith, what would happen to the rest of them?

D groaned and began to pray; the faces of his agents and their families flashing in his mind.  
They needed God now more than ever before.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

Spencer Reid closed his book and added it to the completed stack in his bag. He shifted in the uncomfortable plastic chair, glanced at the clock on the wall, and let out a loud sigh.

"I knew I should have brought more books."  
Tory looked up and rolled her eyes. "Honestly, Spencer. It's harder to pack enough to keep you entertained than it is to pack for two babies."  
Reid sighed again. "We've been here for hours." He groaned. "I wished she'd hurry up. What's taking her so long?"  
"Spencer Reid!" Tory exclaimed in shock, lightly slapping his arm. "You know Savannah has no control over the length of her labor. Just relax and be thankful this happened when you and Morgan are in town."  
Reid nodded. He _was_ glad that Savannah had gone into labor while they were home; he was just _so tired_ of sitting still.

Seconds later his leg began to bounce up and down.  
Tory glared at him. "What is wrong with you today?"  
"Two double espressos." Reid shifted in his chair again as his other leg began to bounce.  
Tory watched her twitching husband and sighed.  
"Here, let's trade. Derek's restless too. You can entertain each other. Besides, if you keep jerking around like that you might drop Gideon."  
Reid stilled long enough to glance down at the peaceful face of the one-month old.  
"That is something I would _never_ do." He pressed a kiss on Gideon's soft, reddish hair and handed him to Tory; taking five-month old Derek into his arms.

Spencer lifted Derek over his head, eliciting a squeal of excitement from the tan-skinned infant.  
"So," he said conversationally, as he settled the baby on his lap. "Why are you giving your Mama a hard time, hmm?"  
Derek gurgled in response, his nearly-black eyes sparkling.  
A soft smile crossed Tory's face. "I love that."  
Reid glanced at her as he adjusted the baby on his knee and began to bounce him. "Love what?"  
Tory shook her head. "Don't you see it, Spencer? He absolutely adores you."  
Reid stilled.  
"You think so?" He asked hesitantly; his voice giving away all the insecurities that plagued him.  
Tory sighed. "Spencer, he lights up every single time he sees you. Day or night. Just the sight of you makes him smile the way nothing else can."  
Spencer looked back at the baby and was immediately rewarded with a wide smile.  
A tender smile filled his face. "I love him so much." He whispered. "But I'm so afraid that I'm going to fail him. Fail all of you."  
Tory leaned against Spencer's shoulder. "That is not possible. I am eternally grateful that my boys have you for a father." Spencer turned to share a kiss with Tory. "I love you so very much." He whispered, resting his forehead against hers.  
"I love you too."

The moment was broken when Derek let out a frustrated squawk. Reid stood with the squirming baby in his arms and bounced him slightly.  
"Come on, wiggle worm. Let's go for a walk. Maybe we can sneak in the back to tell your Aunt Savannah to get a move on." He winked at Tory.

Two hours later Reid was standing in the hospital hallway with Morgan while a nurse helped Savannah nurse their new daughter.  
Reid leaned calmly against the wall, cradling Derek on one arm and Gideon on the other. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he watched his best friend desperately chug the iced coffee he had brought him.

"How does it feel?"  
Morgan lowered the drink and looked at him.  
His dark eyes shone with an emotion far deeper than any Reid had seen before.  
"It's…" Morgan paused and shook his head. "It's incredible. Far beyond anything I ever imagined. She is so beautiful. So perfect."  
"That she is." Reid shifted the boys in his arms and glanced at the closed door of the hospital room.  
A fond smile crossed Morgan's face. "You're just dying to get your hands on your niece, aren't you?"  
Reid nodded.  
The quick look he had gotten of the hungry newborn before being ushered out of the room had not been nearly enough. Morgan chuckled. "Now you know how I feel about your little guys." He took his namesake out of Reid's arms and bent over to kiss Gideon's head.

Reid watched Morgan play with Derek then turned his gaze to Gideon, contemplating what Morgan had said.  
He had been thrilled for Morgan when he learned that Savannah was expecting; happy that he and his friend could add childrearing to their list of shared experiences. But he had never expected this.  
Nothing could have prepared him for the wave of fierce love that had washed over him the moment he saw Morgan's child.

Reid glanced again at the still-closed door and sighed.  
Morgan laughed. "Relax, Pretty Boy. I'll let you hold her as soon as they're done. I promise."  
The door opened and the nurse smiled at the eager faces of the two men. "All done." She turned her attention to Morgan. "Your girls did great. No problems at all."

Reid eagerly led the way into the room then stopped in his tracks nearly causing Morgan to run into him.  
Morgan stepped around Reid to see Tory sitting in the chair by the hospital bed, cradling the newborn.  
He laughed at the deeply offended look on his friend's face. "Jealous, kid?"  
Morgan moved over to Tory. "Sorry, sweetie. I promised Pretty Boy he could hold her as soon as they were done." He carefully traded Derek for his daughter.  
Reid stepped forward and thrust Gideon at Tory.  
Morgan chuckled. "Here you go, kid." He gently placed his tiny little girl into Reid's waiting arms and stepped back.

The room fell silent as everyone watched Reid stare with fascination at the tiny baby girl in his arms.  
Morgan swallowed back the unexpected emotion that washed over him. He had never expected to feel this way. The sight of his best friend being completely taken in by his daughter was something he had never thought he would see and he was unprepared for how deeply it moved him.

Reid swayed slightly, murmuring softly to the newborn.  
"Are you really going to make us wait until the others arrive before you tell us her name?" Reid asked; his voice filled with tenderness and his eyes never leaving the baby's face.  
Morgan brushed a hand over his eyes to wipe away the moisture gathering there and smiled. "Yes, I am. You just have to be patient, kid."

Twenty minutes later the rest of the team arrived and Reid was forced to reluctantly relinquish his hold on the baby and surrender her to the rest of her "family."  
In the excitement no one noticed when Morgan, Hotch, and Rossi quietly slipped out of the room. Several minutes later they returned; the eyes and cheeks of the two older men were suspiciously damp.  
Morgan's eyes sought out Savannah's and he nodded.  
Looking around the crowd in the hospital room, Morgan saw that the pink bundle was once again cradled in Reid's arms. He shook his head wondering how the kid had managed to get her back so quickly.  
 _Probably employed his puppy dog eyes. The ladies can never say no to him._ Morgan thought wryly.  
He crossed the room. "Okay, kid. You have to give her up for a little bit." He carefully took his daughter from Reid and moved to perch on the edge of Savannah's bed.

"Savannah and I talked a lot during the pregnancy about what we wanted for our child. We are both so grateful that our daughter has people like you for role models, for family. We may not be a traditional family, we're not related by blood or marriage, but we _are_ family.  
Savannah and I wanted our child to know that, to never doubt it. We wanted to give her a name that would always remind her of that fact. A name that mean something to her family.  
So, with permission we have decided to name her after two very strong, determined, beautiful women. Two women who though we often did not agree with we were always on the same side even if it did not seem that way. Two women who deep down always had our best interests at heart."  
Morgan paused and his dark eyes glistened with tears. "Two women who I continue to miss every single day. It is with great pleasure that Savannah and I introduce you to our daughter, Haley Erin Morgan."


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

Jack Hudson tried to ignore the sympathetic looks cast his way as he entered the Hoover Building for the first time since the day of his daughter's death.  
He paused outside the elevator and visibly shuddered as memories of his last time in the building washed over him. The guilt and horror grew each time he relived that day. He had been spanking his sons while his daughter was being murdered by cold-blooded terrorists. The guilt felt like a physical weight pressing Jack down into the ground.

Jack paused again in the hallway as he exited the elevator when a group of agents rushed past, steely determination in their eyes. Jack remembered when that had been him. Not too long ago he would have responded to the terrorist attacks by pouring himself into work. He would have been willing to sacrifice _anything_ to catch the masterminds behind the attacks and to ensure that it would never happen again.

But now Jack felt strangely detached. He couldn't help wondering if any of it mattered.  
Was it worth it?  
Years of being on call 24/7. Countless sleepless nights. Cold take-out inhaled during the darkest hours of the night, often the only food consumed during the day. Failed relationships. Loneliness. A heart attack. Gunshot wounds. Betrayal. Dead friends.  
All to protect the country he loved so deeply.  
But he had been unable to protect the most precious gift God had ever given him, his little girl.

Jack hesitated in the doorway of the bullpen, hoping that no one would notice him. He needed time to gather himself before entering the familiar room. The place where he had spent so many years of his life.

Jack's dark eyes wandered around the room, drinking in the scene that had been his life for so long.  
Bobby was leaning back in his chair, his feet propped on the edge of his desk, his phone cradled between his shoulder and ear.  
Jack frowned.  
His best friend looked exhausted, his face paler than normal.  
Myles was sitting at his desk studying something on his computer screen. His blue eyes occasionally shifted to look at something across the room.

The depth of concern and worry on the man's face caught Jack by surprise.  
His brow furrowed in confusion, Jack followed Myles' glance to the desk where Sue had once sat.  
Murdoch Jamison sat there now.  
Jack's breath caught when he saw the change in the young man.  
The youngest agent was a mere shadow of his former self. In the two weeks since Anna Grace's funeral, Murdoch had lost more weight than Jack would have thought possible in such a short time. His face was as pale as a white sheet of paper. The deep, dark circles under his eyes gave the normally piercing blue eyes a sunken, lifeless look.

Jack pulled away from the door and leaned against the wall, out of sight. For the first time he felt a twinge of interest in what was going on around him. What had gone wrong in his absence? _What had happened to Murdoch?_

"Jack." D kept his voice low, hoping not to alert the team to the fact that their leader was hiding in the hallway.  
"Jack." D repeated as he neared his friend. Seeing the lost look on the younger man's face, D sighed and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Come on, Jack. Come with me. Come on."

D steered him to his office and shut the door.  
"Sit down, buddy." He lightly pushed Jack down into a chair.  
"Jack." D spoke firmer and Jack seemed to snap out of whatever he had slipped into. He raised his head and seemed to notice D for the first time.  
"D?"  
D nodded. "It's good to have you back, buddy. We can take this as slowly as you need to." He shrugged. "We just want you back."  
Jack looked away from his friend and supervisor. He rubbed a hand over his face and tried to make sense of the thoughts and emotions whirling through him.

Finally he focused on the question whose answer he dreaded.  
"What happened to Murdoch?"  
D frowned in confusion then perched on the edge of his desk as the realization of what Jack meant sank in.  
"The same thing that happened to you, to all of us." D spoke quietly. His heart ached as he watched understanding dawn on Jack's face and the pain in the dark eyes increased.

Jack closed his eyes as memories washed over him.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One**

" _It's a girl." Murdoch announced.  
Sue fell back exhausted, a wide smile on her face.  
"Is she okay? Is she crying? I want to see her." Sue's eyes sought Jack's face.  
Jack stroked Sue's hair with a shaking hand. "She's beautiful, sweetheart. Let Murdoch finish. You'll see her soon. Just relax for a minute."  
Sue's eyes closed.  
Jack could not stop the tears as he watched Murdoch working frantically over the tiny, limp, blue body. _

" _Come on, baby girl. Breathe for me. You can do it, honey. Please, baby, please breathe. Don't do this to us, angel. Please, breathe." Murdoch Jamison pleaded as he performed CPR on the limp body of the tiny baby girl.  
Jack closed his eyes and turned away. Unable to watch any longer. The pain in his chest was greater than any he had known before._

 _"Jack?" Sue's happy tone had turned worried as her eyes fastened on his face.  
He opened his eyes.  
"Jack, what's wrong?"  
"Sue," Jack was interrupted by a weak, tentative cry. He closed his eyes as more tears slid down his face.  
It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard._

" _Sue, is something wrong?" Jack jumped up as Sue rushed into the bullpen, carrying twenty-month old Anna Grace.  
Four-year old Jackson and three-year old Wesley followed close behind her, holding hands.  
Tears glistened in Sue's hazel eyes. "It's Anna Grace."  
Fear gripped Jack's heart as his eyes scanned his tiny daughter, looking for any injuries.  
"She said her first word."  
"What?!" Jack stepped back in shock, his dark eyes widening. "What did she say?"  
Sue grinned. "She picked up a picture of Murdoch and said 'Doch' or at least something close to that."  
Jack grinned widely and looked toward the young agent's desk before remembering that he had sent the two rookie agents down to the archives.  
"Wait until Wonder Boy hears this." Jack held out his hands and Anna Grace went to him eagerly as the rest of the team gathered around the Hudson family. _

" _What's going on?" Josiah asked as he and his partner entered the bullpen, each carrying a large stack of files.  
"Enjoy your time in the dungeon, boys?" Myles asked, quirking an eyebrow at their dusty appearance.  
The younger men simultaneously rolled their eyes and dumped the files on the nearest desk, sending up a small cloud of dust.  
"So, what's up?" Josiah asked again.  
"Our little Miss Sparkles said her first word." Bobby's dimpled smile filled his face.  
"Really?" The eyes of both young men lit up. "What did she say?"  
Sue turned to Murdoch. "She picked up a picture of you and said 'Doch.'"_

 _The group watched as an array of emotions crossed the normally stoic face of their young genius.  
Jack nudged Anna Grace's head up from his shoulder and pointed toward Murdoch.  
The toddler turned and her Hudson eyes lit up.  
"Doch!" She lisped out, lunging out of Jack's arms to Murdoch.  
A cheer erupted as Murdoch hugged the toddler tightly. As the celebration quieted down the young man shifted the little girl in his arms and pointed at Jack.  
"Who's that?" He spoke and signed, then tapped Anna Grace's mouth. "Use your voice."  
"Da, Daddy."_

 _It had been a brutal month. Beginning with a serial killer case on a college campus and ending with the abduction of five-year old twin girls. An abduction which had resulted in the death of one of the girls only an hour before they were rescued._

 _The team was picnicking in the park, enjoying some much need downtime together.  
"Jack." Sue nudged him with her elbow.  
"Hmm." He mumbled from his place beside her on the blanket.  
"Jack, look." Sue nudged him insistently.  
Jack groaned and forced his eyes to open.  
Rising up on his elbows, he followed Sue's pointing finger to where Murdoch sat on the ground by the sandbox a short distance away with Anna Grace standing in front of him a delighted smile on her face._

 _Jack's exhausted eyes softened and a fond smile crossed his face as he watched the young man repeat the simple phrase and gestures he had used for the past three years every time he was with Anna Grace._

" _Murdoch," he pointed to himself. "Loves" he signed 'love' "Anna Grace." Murdoch finished by pointing to Anna Grace then tickling her stomach before drawing her into a hug.  
Jack and Sue watched as Anna Grace stepped back from the hug. Their breath caught as they saw their little girl raise her hand and point to herself.  
"Anna Grace loves Doch!"  
The emotion in the young man's blue eyes made Jack and Sue blink back tears. Three-year old Anna Grace had repeated the phrase before, but never before had she changed it to express her love.  
Jack and Sue shared a glance. There was no doubt about it.  
The bond between their little girl and the young agent was something incredible._

 _The graveside service was over. It was time to go.  
But Jack could not move. His eyes fastened on the small white coffin that held the lifeless body of his daughter. He knew that if he walked away the nightmare he had been living in would become a firm reality.  
When he walked away, they would put his little girl in the ground._

 _A movement to the side caught Jack's attention. He watched as Murdoch Jamison walked up to the coffin. The young agent rarely showed emotion. His blue eyes were normally so stoic that he had been excused of being cold-hearted. But now the young man's body was jerking and shaking uncontrollably with the force of the sobs tearing out of him. Jack watched as Murdoch gripped the edge of the small coffin. His hold on it the only thing keeping him collapsing. His silent sobs occasionally broken by a heartbroken wail._

 _Jack's own tears returned as he witnessed the young man's hopeless grief. He knew that he should go to him. Comfort him. Use the pain of the moment to point him to the Gospel. Offer him the only thing that was getting Jack through each moment; the hope of seeing Anna Grace again. Murdoch could have that hope if he would only turn to Christ.  
Jack knew that that would be the right thing to do. Even more it would be what Anna Grace would want him to do.  
But Jack could bring himself to move forward and Murdoch was left alone in his overwhelming grief._

As the last memory faded away Jack groaned and leaned forward, covering his face with his hands as tears fell from his eyes. "Oh, God, what have I done?"


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Spencer Reid shifted the bags of Thai takeout in his hands as he stepped off the elevator onto the maternity ward. He frowned when he saw Derek Morgan leaning against the wall outside Savannah's room; his strong shoulders slumped with despair.

"Hey," Reid lifted the bags he held for Morgan to see. "Here's the dinner I promised you guys."  
Morgan looked up from studying the cell phone in his hand.  
"Thanks, kid." A slight smile crossed his tired face, but he made no move to take the food.

Reid raised an eyebrow and leaned against the wall next to his best friend. "What's up?"  
Morgan sighed heavily. "I called Bobby."  
His shoulders seemed to slump even farther. "To tell him about Haley." Morgan's voice was subdued. The joyful excitement of earlier overshadowed by pain.

Reid nodded. The all too-familiar wave of pain washed over him as he thought of little Anna Grace. She had been in his thoughts ever since learning that Derek and Savannah had had a girl. Reid knew that the news of Haley's birth would have been bittersweet to Bobby.

"I've been thinking about them today too. I'm sure Bobby appreciated your call. You have to know that he's happy about Haley, even if he was unable to express it well."  
Morgan shook his head. "It's not that."  
Reid waited then rolled his eyes when his friend did not offer any more information.  
"Then what is it?"  
Morgan sighed and rubbed a hand over his head. "Jack returned to work today. He…" Morgan hesitated slightly. "He and Sue are not doing well. They've shut themselves off from everyone and have been refusing all contact. D talked to him today and is hopeful that things might improve. But Bobby sounded rough, nothing like himself. I think he is worried the most about Murdoch though."  
Reid frowned and shifted the takeout bags in his hands. "Murdoch?"  
"Yeah. You know how attached he and Anna Grace were."  
Reid nodded, knowing that Morgan was right. Anyone could've of seen the bond between the blonde-haired little girl and the blue-eyed young agent.

Morgan sighed. "According to Bobby, Wonder Boy is pretty much living at the office. No one has actually seen him eat or sleep since the attacks. They're just assuming he has because he is still functioning somewhat. Apparently, the kid has decided that the terrorists' attacks were his fault."  
"What? That's makes no sense."  
"Yeah, tell me about it." Morgan shrugged one shoulder. "Something about because he speaks Arabic and is his unit's liaison with counterterrorism he should have seen warning signs or heard chatter and been able to stop it. Despite the fact that the bureau's entire Counter-Terrorism unit, the NSA, and the CIA were taken completely by surprise."  
Morgan glanced at Reid. "What is it about being a genius that makes you guys think you are personally responsible for _everything_ that happens in this world?"

Reid closed his eyes; his heart sinking at the thought of his young friend trying to shoulder that burden alone.

"I called him last week, but he didn't answer. I should have tried again. Tried harder."  
Morgan groaned and shook his head. "Uh-uh. No you don't, Pretty Boy. One genius blaming himself for something completely beyond his control is more than enough. This is not your fault. You hear me?"  
Morgan studied the despondent look on Reid's face. "Come on, kid. Snap out of it."

Reid pushed off the wall and held the takeout bags out to Morgan. "Here, I'm sure Savannah is starving for non-hospital food by now. Go enjoy your evening with your wife and daughter."  
Morgan raised an eyebrow as he took the bags.  
"Where are you going? It's obvious you brought enough for all of us. And I thought the deal was that you'd bring food if we gave you an uninterrupted hour of holding Haley."  
Reid shrugged one thin shoulder. "So, you owe me an hour of Haley-time. I've got a phone call to make. Talk to you later."


End file.
